My boss was no exception. She pounded down 3 LARGE beers and her small frame just can't handle that much alcohol. My fun night of dinner and drinks with my coworkers was coming to an end, but I noticed Ms. Slurring-Her-Words over there was ready to go, but I insisted that she drink some coffee, and stayed there until her sentences were no longer words mashed together into one long confusing word.
Dr. Doug mentioned how the Mythbusters experimented with sobering up techniques which included coffee, and slapping.
And so the thought was planted, we "inception"ed her drunk mind, and so she exclaimed, "SLAP ME!". It was as if the stars aligned in this perfect serendipitous moment. I'm pretty sure I heard angels sing.
I gave her a weak slap....at first. I thought she was kidding. I was wrong. She wanted a slap-me-sober whomp, and I gave it to her THREE TIMES!
It was quite possibly the best night ever. She slapped me once too, probably as a little payback. Nothing in my life has been quite as fulfilling as slapping my boss.
I always dreamed of slapping/punching someone right in the face. "How dramatic", I thought to myself, "it would never happen!" A few months ago my student worker promised me that he would let me punch him in the face as long as I didn't hit his eye or nose (getting hit in the nose will make anyone tear up, and I think he wanted to seem more manly by not crying when a girl punched him). So I agreed, and then my student worker backed down! How dare he! We had a verbal agreement! I should fire him. Maybe not, he is too entertaining to cut loose.
And so there you have it folks, here is your guideline on how to properly slap your boss...like a boss!Sincerely Yours,
Slap-Happy Ana
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